Blain Nelson's Abuse Pages
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Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Dr. Laura has been a very important part of my life, as I mention any time I tell the story of how I found recovery. She won't appeal to everybody, and she doesn't hit a home-run on every pitch, but her basic approach is quite refreshing against a backdrop of vacillating amorality as has been all too apparent in recent years.

Stephen R. Covey

During the time I was struggling with being alive and stuff, a good friend suggested I look into Mr. Covey's writing. I did, and have never regretted it. His principle-centered approach is, again, quite refreshing.

Michael Paymar

In the world of abuser recovery, every treatment program out there can tell you whether or not it is a "Duluth" type of program. Duluth, MN is the home of the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project, the nice folks who developed the Power and Control Wheel and the Equality Wheel (which the title and button logo of this site is based upon). Michael Paymar is one of these nice folks, and I've seen him in action in a videotape we use in our program. He seems to know what he's doing (which, in this field, is not a given), and his book Violent No More, available just below, is strongly recommended by my cofacilitator (I haven't yet read it).

Deborah Tannen, Ph. D.

Some years ago I was discussing communications with some friends of mine. One of them mentioned that she'd tried John Gray's book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, and found it completely useless, but that she'd found Dr. Tannen's books and they had helped her immensely. On that recommendation, I've purchased two of her books and have found them very helpful also. Dr. Tannen is a sociolinguist, and her exploration of conversation style is very helpful in explaining why communications between people can go so very wrong for no apparent reason.

John Gray, Ph.D.

My friend aside, I and many other people have found John Gray's work to be a good place to start in the world of communication between the sexes. Some careful reading of his stuff can help you avoid some pitfalls (for example, attempting to apply "Martian" patterns to all men and only men) that others have fallen into with his books.

Gary Smalley

Gary Smalley is a noted Christian author and lecturer on marriages and relationships. We've used some of his videos in group and I've found them very helpful. Some of his work is targeted at a Christian audience, and some is written to a more general audience, but all of it brings a hopeful yet practical approach to making an intimate relationship work.

Rev. Marie M. Fortune

Rev. Fortune founded the Center for the Prevention of Sexual and Domestic Violence, an international, interreligious, educational resource on abuse and religion. I have seen her in action in the videoBroken Vows, and I would commend it to everyone interested in learning about abuse, and everyone involved in a religious community.

Richard Bach

This isn't a self-help author, exactly, but his writings have proven helpful to folks having a rough time. I find them interesting in starting me thinking about things in a useful way.

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