I’ve been awake about two hours. I’m having some anxiety and it’s bugging me a lot (redundant much?). I think it’s from the meds I’m taking, as anxiety is listed as a known side effect. I can’t seem to shake it off.
I injured my back a few days ago — tore a muscle between the ribs which have gotten inflamed and are quite painful. On Thursday (this happened Tuesday evening), I started on a muscle relaxer and a pain medication you’ve probably heard of. They’ve been knocking me on my butt, and I’ve had quite a lot of sleep since that time. But, now, I’m unable to sleep, and I’m quite tired, because it feels like I’m not going to be able to keep breathing — like I have to consciously think about breathing or I might stop, and that fear keeps me awake.
I know I’m not going to stop breathing. But that fear is just in there and it doesn’t have to make sense to be compelling.
I think I’m going to cut back on the pain med I was prescribed — half doses or less. The pain is still there, and I’ve taken the pain med regularl to try to stay ahead of the pain, but this is really bothering me.
I think I’m going to go for a walk, just to have something to do and to maybe metabolize some of this stuff away.
I didn’t. But I did lay down and concentrated on breathing slowly and steadily, and I might have dozed off a bit. Now I’m going to eat a little something to see if that helps. This has me a little shaken, if that wasn’t clear.
It’s later now. I’m going to get ready to head up for Church now. I’m singing in a small men’s group (six guys, four parts) in conference. I feel very strange still, and more than a little uneasy. I will ask for a blessing when I get there.